


Masterful Birthday

by Rae_Saxon



Category: Doctor Who
Genre: F/M, Just wanted to emphasise, Multi, Stripping, That there are many Masters, in case it wasn't clear
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-16
Updated: 2020-08-16
Packaged: 2021-03-06 04:01:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,002
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25937095
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rae_Saxon/pseuds/Rae_Saxon
Summary: The Masters have a birthday party. Simm wasn't invited but came anyway. The Doctor wasn't invited and came anyway. Thankfully, almost none of them knows that it's her. No better way to stay alive then claim she's the hired stripper, is there?
Relationships: The Doctor/The Master (Doctor Who), Thirteenth Doctor/The Master (Dhawan)
Comments: 8
Kudos: 61





	Masterful Birthday

There was cake.

All in all, that was really what tipped the Master over the edge. Of all the things he did not get invited to – He had not expected it to be his own birthday party.

“All of you!” he shouted angrily. “All of you were invited but me! What have I ever done to you?”

“The oldest was responsible for the invites,” Missy replied with a yawn. “Because it makes sense. Ask him, really.”

The Master turned around to his oldest present incarnation and his silly purple-checked waistcoat. He was looking utterly unimpressed, his hand raised to inspect his nails.

“Must've gotten lost in the mail.”

The Master knew he was just being petty. Because he was him. And he loved being petty. He just couldn't stand it being directed towards him.

“You planned a whole birthday party with every single one of us attending, but my invitation got mysteriously lost in the mail? Sure.”

The younger Masters looked a bit uncomfortable. Black and bearded 2 tugged on his velvet attire, black and bearded 1 straightened the freshly picked yellow daffodil he had added to his perfect, yellow lined suit. The American looked dramatically more bored with every second passing that wasn't about _him_. Bald Master looked like he was simply watching the most interesting movie and was lacking popcorn, the crispy ones looked like they were in pain – Which, to be fair, they probably were.

Even the one that sometimes came to visit them from another universe had been invited and had arrived packed with salads and some baguette, now standing there, frozen, as he held the food in his arms.

In the corner, War Master stood and played with weapons, not paying them any attention, as usual.

But he, oh, _he_ was not going to have any of this, he didn't care how uncomfortable or bored they were with his outrage, he was to be invited! With a quick whirl, he turned towards his oldest self, laser screwdriver in his hands faster than anyone could react and held it right to his chest, the hot tip poking through the blue shirt.

The other Master flinched back so quickly, for a second he thought he had actually burnt him. He stumbled backwards against the wall, fingers trembling slightly.

“That's... that's right!” he called out, confused by the intense reaction, yet pretending it was what he had wanted. “That's what you get for not inviting me.”

“Put that thing down,” his older self hissed. “Stop being so bloody dramatic. This is exactly why I didn't invite you. I don't want to celebrate our birthday with a death before cake.” He stopped, a crooked grin fighting its way onto his face. “At least not _our_ death.”

Letting his laser screwdriver sink, the sulking Master stepped away.

“Like I'd ever actually do it,” he snorted, not noticing that his older self's hands were still trembling when he straightened his purple jacket, not noticing his eyes flinching to an unsuspecting Missy.

“So,” he instead announced into the room. “There's cake for me, too, is there?”

“We're currently standing in a whole cake factory, I think you'll manage,” the bald one replied with a grin. “It'll be rough though, I heard our American self here likes to eat for five.”

“You try to survive with a human body burning up around you,” the American Master replied with that horrible accent.

“I know the feeling,” the sulking Master replied, exchanging a look with him that clearly held more challenge than pity.

The oldest Master sighed. Here they stood, in the middle of a cake factory, lovingly decorated by their youngest ones, and they were going to actually start a race for cake.

Just as he tried to call everyone to order, his mouth open, his arms raised to try the formal greeting his impulsive younger self had interrupted earlier, there was a loud crash audible from one of the side rooms. They all exchanged a look, then got out their weapons in the exact same moment. TCEs, laser screwdrivers and other devices pointed forwards, they all headed for the side room.

“Have you left anyone alive?” their youngest self asked with barely veiled judgement in his smooth voice and one of the crispy ones rolled his eyes – Or so it looked like. With the fallen in corpse face that they were currently facing, no one could be exactly sure.

“Of course not. We went through every room twice. Everyone should be disposed of.”

“Well,” Missy said with dry tone as they had entered the little room and seen the figure of a woman lying on the floor, blonde hair fallen into her face, shoulders hunched and a hole in the roof above her that was roughly her shape. “I'd say that riddle is solved.”

“Who are you?” the Traken Master called out with all the authority he could muster, his TCE raised as he stepped forwards.

The woman lifted herself up with a confused look on her face, pieces of roof still caught in her hair and the oldest Master groaned quietly.

She could _not_ be serious right now.

The Doctor's mouth fell open, her eyes wide and full of (rightful) fear as she looked around the little circle that had tightened around her.

“Oh,” she muttered, quickly getting back to her feet, her eyes scanning for an escape that just wasn't there. “Uhm... What....”

The oldest Master quickly jumped to her side, stepping between his younger self's TCE and the Doctor without even thinking.

“Come on, guys, we don't want to let our birthday party get ruined by a little human? I'll take care of this one, you just...”

“Why not kill her all together?” the War Master asked with glinting eyes. Oh, _now_ he was paying attention, of course he was. “Start off the party with a bit of fun.”

Panic flooded the Master. There were a few far too hateful Masters in their little group to even try and enclose to them who they were dealing with. He turned to Missy, because it was the only thing he could think of and she was shaking her head softly, suppressing a laugh.

Thankfully, the Doctor's brains seemed to have caught up with her and she spread her arms with a wide grin.

“Right!” she called. “Your birthday! That's right! I found you!”

“Found us?” the Master replied, his laser screwdriver not lowered even a little bit. “Why were you looking for us?”

“Because you're the Master, see, and I was instructed... hired, in fact, to... uhm... surprise you with...” She cleared her throat, looking lost for only a second, before her eyes got that gleam they did when she had (a really mad) idea. “I'm the stripper!”

“The... stripper?” the Master asked, looking around in confusion. “Which of you...?”

Everyone shook their heads, looking just as confused as he did. With an inner eye roll, the oldest Master stepped forwards, tucking his own TCE back into his coat pocket.

“Well, come on, you didn't really think I'd forget to invite you, would you?” Thankfully, lying through their teeth was every Master's biggest skill. “I got her to surprise you. I know how much you like blondes.”

He looked her up and down with eyes narrowed in suspicion and the older Master could see the Doctor shiver slightly under his glance. Whether it was pleasure or fear, he wasn't quite sure, but he made a mental note to find out later.

Finally, he seemed to have decided he liked what he saw.

“Weird outfit for a stripper. But she's cute, I guess. Lucy was prettier though,” he added with a side note, when he put his Laser Screwdriver away and led the way out of the room. The other Masters followed him, leaving only the oldest Master, Missy and the Doctor, who looked offended.

She put out her tongue towards his back, mouthing “Lucy was prettier” in a mocking tone and gave the older Master an absolute death glare when he started giggling.

“Well, I hope you know how to strip, love,” he winked at her, before he left the room.

“How hard can it be?” she turned towards Missy. “I just take off my clothes and then all men do is stare at my breasts, right?”

“I don't know about the men,” Missy replied with a little wink, holding open the door for her. “But I'm sure going to.”

It was a bit disturbing, really, the way they all stood grouped up around her in the insanely over-decorated warehouse. There were cakes everywhere and the American one she had fought back in her Eighth incarnation had done nothing but stuff more cake into his face whenever she glanced at him.

They really had come here just to celebrate their birthday, she realised. Which, in general, could've been harmless, but so many Masters in one spot, birthday party or not, could end up deadly. Especially for her.

Though the Doctor had to admit she honestly wasn't sure how to escape this growingly awkward situation. She had just wanted to save the day, do what she always did and when the poor, panicked cake factory worker had ran up to her, waving his arms and shouting for help, she hadn't exactly expected.... _this_.

She had been to a strip show once or twice. It wasn't exactly her kind of thing... She supposed that simply wasn't how sexual attraction worked for her. But she knew the theory of it. Sway your hips a little, sit on someone's lap, get naked. She imagined one of the Masters do it and yup, _that_ was how her sexual attraction worked.

She could do that, right?

Right. Right. She still felt a little bit of panic surge through her as she stood in the middle of the circle of Masters, walking towards the one currently sitting on the chair, legs spread, a content grin on his face and his arms back against his head, as if it was his throne.

“Well?” he said. “Get started before I decide you're useless to me.”  
  
“Right,” the Doctor turned around frantically, turning towards her most recent Master. “Music?”

He raised an eyebrow, but did her the favour of pulling out his phone and letting a bit of music play. It wasn't optimal, but it echoed in the warehouse enough to be heard by everyone.

“Bit badly prepared, aren't you?” the Master on the chair asked, eyes narrowed again. “And the outfit...”

“Oh, uhm...,” the Doctor stammered. “I was instructed to... uhm... resemble a certain type. You know. Bit clumsy. Awkward. Unconventional fashion sense. We thought it was a bit odd, but the customer is King, as they say.”

A wide grin spread on the Master's face.

“Awwww!” he called out as he turned towards his older self. “You got me someone to act like the Doctor!”

The Doctor blushed a little, hoping no one could see the warmth crawl up into her cheeks.

“Mh, yeah,” the older Master replied, trying to distract from Missy's giggling. “Thought you'd enjoy it. Didn't think she'd.... play the role _that_ well, though.”

The Doctor took a deep breath, her eyes closing, just for a second to concentrate, let the music seep into her bones, then started moving. She knew she needed to focus on the Master before her, as he was clearly the most dangerous and trigger-happy of the lot of them. She looked into his eyes with what she hoped was seduction, as she slipped her coat off her shoulders with what she hoped was grace.

It fell to her feet and, trying her best not to stumble over it, the Doctor moved a little to the left, while stepping closer to the chair, hands on her suspenders.

This was actually quite nice. She moved a bit in tact with the music, then let her suspenders fall down, one after another. She bit her lower lip, watching the Master's eyes go over her body again hungrily, feeling the other's gazes on her and it gave her a rather odd rush.

She hadn't expected this thrill it sent through her at all, hell, she wasn't even naked yet. With a little grin, she moved her hips suggestively, her hands going underneath her shirt, wandering up slowly, fingers spread out on her skin. She wasn't wearing a bra, because, quite frankly, she hadn't managed to get used to them, so instead, she simply pulled off the shirt slowly, teasing once before finally tossing it over her head for one of the Masters to catch and stood there with her chest free.

Chills were running over her skin, leaving her nipples perked up and the Master licked his lips as he watched her, leaning forwards.

Was she imagining it or had the circle of Masters around her closed in a little?

 _Fine then, focus Doctor, focus._ Boots next. She tried to gracefully bow down and grab them, but it didn't quite work how she wanted it. So instead, she started frantically moving her leg until the first boot flew off. Relieved by the success of the mission, she repeated the motion with the other boot, raising her leg and shaking it again.

“Ouch!” the oldest Master called, holding his nose with one hand and her boot with the other.

Well, she'd still mark that down as a success. Giving him a cheeky wink, she turned back towards the Master sitting on the chair, who was watching her with a confused little frown now. Okay, okay, she hadn't exactly been elegant, a distraction was needed.

She grabbed the back of his chair with both hands, leaning over his head, her breasts almost touching him, before dancing around the chair again, leaving him looking slightly dazed, his eyes still on her breasts when she stood in front of him again.

Perfect.

With a little fumbling, she managed to open the fly of her trousers while keeping up the movement, but now it was getting tricky. Without much thinking, she let herself sink down onto the Master's lap, wriggling her eyebrows at him, while shifting suggestively.

He swallowed visibly and she could feel his erection beneath her, as she grabbed her socks and pulled them off her feet quickly, throwing them off.

Getting up again, she finally started pulling down her trousers, teasing them by holding up the hem, before finally letting them fall and pool around her feet. She stepped out of them, tripped over her suspenders and got caught last minute by the velvety Master, who looked down at her with a raised eyebrow and a smirk that clearly indicated that he had figured out what was going on.

She gave him a grateful little smile, standing up in nothing but her blue lace panties and bowed down quickly.

It had been fun while it lasted, but she clearly wasn't as good at it as she had hoped. Here's to hope, she thought, that they'd let her go in peace for her attempt.

The oldest Master let the song fade out, before stepping forwards with a look on his face as if Christmas had come early, handing her her boots.

“What a show, love,” he whispered, and she could, just briefly, feel his hand on her ass. She managed to cover up her moan with a cough – She was fairly sure _she_ was not meant to be the person who was turned on here - and turned towards the Master she had danced for, who had, to her relief, gotten up and clapped.

“Not bad,” he finally conceded with an indulgent grin. “You definitely have done well. The Doctor would've probably been even clumsier, but that would've just ruined the show.”

“Right,” she muttered. “Clumsy, stupid Doctor.”

“Maybe we should invite the real deal next time, a friendly invite, brought to him by some Cybermen. See how he manages.”

“Maybe,” the oldest Master replied, nodding eagerly, as he laid a hand on his back and led him towards the buffet they had built up. “But now you really deserve some cake.”

Missy watched them with a grin, before pulling her vortex manipulator off her wrist and throwing it towards the Doctor.

“Off you go, my dear,” she winked. “You've definitely saved this party.”

The other Masters all walked past her towards the buffet, all clearly indicating that they knew who she was, wriggling her eyebrows, giving her pecks on the cheek and knowing little chuckles as one by one handed her back a piece of her clothing. The only Master that seemed still completely oblivious, was standing at the table, stuffing his face with cake.

With a little grin, the Doctor grabbed her clothes and sneaked off.

Tired, but definitely content, all the Master left the party in their own TARDIS, each and everyone promising to repeat the experience next year.

The oldest Master was still chuckling to himself when he typed in fresh coordinates, setting off into space for a night's rest.

He wasn't sure if he could get the Doctor as a stripper act for next year's party, but he most certainly was going to try. Those were simply images he was never going to forget again. Neither of them were, from the looks on their faces.

With a shake of his head, he walked around the console and only then did he spot a little wrapped up package lying there. He would've scanned it for traps and poisons if it wasn't for the clumsy wrapping and the crooked bow and the little post-it note that spelled “Koschei” in Gallifreyan.

He walked so fast he almost stumbled over his own feet, grabbing it staring at it with clear shock, before opening it carefully, keeping the note.

“ _Thanks for not ratting me out. I couldn't tell you earlier, so this will have to do... but.... Happy birthday, Master. - T ”_

He grinned as he pulled a single blue lace panty out of the package.

Yup.

He was definitely inviting her again.

**Author's Note:**

> I had this idea inspired by the Masterful summary (Big Finish) and made a deal with Melkur_Mistress, that we'd both post our different versions of this birthday party, so make sure to check out her version, too! :D Knowing her, it probably has a lot more Master on Master action than this one has. 
> 
> https://archiveofourown.org/works/25936831
> 
> I'd love some kudos or comments, you know me, I'm a sucker for them. <3


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